I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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