We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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