But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
