I can tuck mytits in my pants
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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