And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
This is my gift to your gina
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
