Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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