one two three fourrrrnication!
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
