omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
