Yo dont text me then not text me
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
