I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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