On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
