I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
