is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
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