I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
