No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
