I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
He did a backflip because drugs
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