Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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