Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
