Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
