i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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