it was like eating out sand paper
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
