found the other keg... it's in the tree
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize