They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i will never coherently bang her
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
