Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
