It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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