shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i wish my penis had a tongue
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
