im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
