I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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