420 ftw
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
