where does the pee come out of this thing
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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