her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
