And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
