I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
