They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
zippers are such a cool invention
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
