He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Are my feet made of real feet?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
This is my gift to your gina
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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