Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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