you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
