He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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