There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
