Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
