So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
