I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
