I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
