tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Randomize
