Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
