Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
