so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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