i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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