my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
