Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
