I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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