Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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